As any farmer will tell you, the most necessary task of tending to a herd is also one of the most time consuming. Cow massaging plays a crucial role in milk production, tenderness of beef, and the long term stability of bovine marriages. In recent years, the prosperity of hipsters around the world has resulted in an exponentially increased need for grass fed beef. With this, the long standing tradition known as 'hoofing' has dissipated and steers no longer tend to the heifers in their herds. The 'Happy Cow Massager' by Kerbl is one agricultural invention from which everyone benefits because, as the saying goes, "happy cow, happy t-bone."